It was our first year to host Thanksgiving at the farm after celebrating the last 20 years in Carthage at Grandmommy’s house.
Change is hard.
Our family likes SAME. Same foods, same traditions, same, same, SAME. So all the different was a little scary.
But I think Justin said it best, “I’m thankful that traditions have more to do with who you’re with than where you are.”
It was a great week of family time and prep for the festivities.
And a beautiful, perfect Thanksgiving day for old and new traditions: the coronation of the Pumpkin Queen,
Pumpkin Olympics (with the addition of carefully curated hype music),
Chicken Dancing (with live chicken in hand), and an afternoon of feasting, fellowship, and football.
I had all my kids home for the first time in a very long time.
Our barn, our bellies, and our hearts were full.
Believe me, nothing is ever perfect, no matter how perfect the pictures might look. One of our cats was locked in the barn overnight, so Thanksgiving morning we woke to a pile of poop on our doormat and a spilled gallon of paint on the floor. We had a septic scare right before people started arriving, and Josh spent an hour running a hose to break up a clog. We had uninvited flies and bees at our gathering (we are in a barn after all). And one of my kids ate so much they puked.
And of course, there were beloved faces missing around our table.
But God.
These are the good old days.
Thanks for giving thanks with me.
“But encourage one another daily, as long as it is called “Today.”(Hebrews 3:13a)
“Enter his gates with thanksgiving and his courts with praise; give thanks to him and praise his name.” (Psalms 100:4)
“Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good; his love endures forever.” (Psalms 107:1)
~ for a beautiful fall. Texas isn’t known for colorful autumn foliage, but I think it’s splendid around here myself! These views just don’t get old.
~ for rain. I really love the rain, especially listening to it on the metal casita roof.
~ for a fun night for the girls at their first Homecoming Barn Dance. Aren’t they lovely?
~ for a productive Gold Network ETX Board meeting. The men and women on our Board are truly a gift to me, each one bringing unique perspective and talent to the table. So thankful for friends who share the vision!
~ for my hardworking kids. I’m so proud of how much they have learned since we’ve bought the farm. They have learned to use most tools, many of them completely independently. This week they helped Dad replace a pump on the pond fountain, build a cover for the pump, and hang more finish trim on the barn. They never cease to amaze me.
~ for days when homework looks like this.
~ for sweet Birdie recovering from her spay surgery. No more puppies for this mama. Also, sometimes my kids are strange.
~ for a tasty steak dinner and a date with my sweetheart. Love that we are still dating after 25 years.
My pastor said something in his sermon this morning that I immediately wrote down. I’m sure I’ve heard it before, but today it just really resonated in my heart.
“That’s how He found me, but that’s not how He left me.”
I think of the condition I was in when I found the Lord. WHAT A MESS! Lost, lonely, disillusioned, aimless. Equal parts ashamed and afraid. I was no good to nobody.
But God.
My girls have a favorite song that they learned at Pine Cove camp over the summer. It’s one of those songs that has a pounding beat that gets right into your pulse, and the lyrics make you want to SHOUT.
“He picked me up, He turned me around He placed my feet on solid ground I thank the Master, I thank the Savior Because He healed my heart He changed my name Forever free, I’m not the same I Thank the Master, I Thank the Savior I thank God”
Tonight I’m just filled with gratitude to my loving, redemptive Father who met me in my mess.
“That’s how He found me, but that’s not how He left me.“
Thanks for giving thanks with me.
“I waited patiently for the Lord; he turned to me and heard my cry. He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire; he set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand. He put a new song in my mouth, a hymn of praise to our God. Many will see and fear the Lord and put their trust in him.” (Psalms 40:1-3)
“I will give them an undivided heart and put a new spirit in them; I will remove from them their heart of stone and give them a heart of flesh.” (Ezekiel 11:19)
~ for the spicy sweet smell of cinnamon spice waffles.
~ for our sweet Sprinkles who surprised us with 7 darling bantam chicks. She’s such a good little mama. And Tatum K is the proudest Grandma.
~ for growth emerging on my baby rose bushes. Looking pretty good for Day 19.
Day 1Day 19
~ for hot, buttery homemade JoJo’s Biscuits to go with our tasty farm fresh eggs.
~ for the beauty of the the intricate lacework of frost glittering on a cold autumn morning.
~ for the tedious task of carefully covering all our garden plants to protect from said frost. We’ve never done this before (really, we’ve never done ANY of this stuff before) so (as per the usual) we weren’t sure what we were doing. Thankfully we got MOST of it covered, and MOST of our plants were salvaged. Definitely a big learning curve, but it was a start. We’ll be better prepared next time!
~ for the meaningful tradition of our Family Thankful Game. Initiated and maintained by Grandmommy, it’s a beautiful way for our family to share our hearts daily as we give thanks for the big and the small things around us. “Dear LORD, we DO have so much to be thankful for.”
~ for a GLORIOUS VICTORY as our Texas Rangers CAME AND TOOK the World Series!!! We watched every game, and I bit off every nail, and we are sure the screams in our barn echoed from Arlington to Arizona. Although we were never quite all together in the same place to watch the games, we were all watching as “together” as possible. And the long-awaited win was an emotional one. Baseball, specifically Texas Rangers baseball, means a lot to our family, and it just felt really special to feel like we got to be a part of history. I know our kids will always remember it.
Colton’s “Thankful” entry
~ for a lovely evening of worship with our church ladies here at the farm. We feasted on hot soup and fellowship around a blazing campfire. It was a perfect evening.
~ for the next step of progress on finishing the barn. “How can there still be more to do?” you ask. We are learning that there will always be more to do. This week’s project involved, installing custom metalwork on the facia directly below the roofline. It was one of those steps I didn’t really understand…it didn’t seem important. I was absolutely amazed at the difference it made, and so thankful to have that area of the barn protected from the weather. And so very thankful that Cooper was willing to interrupt his plans and come help.
~ for one of our favorite days of the year: the annual trip to Yesterland Farm with our Gold Network of East Texas HERO families. The fall weather was glorious, the staff was welcoming as always, and the air was full of laughter. What a gift to serve such an incredible group of people. They’ve walked through hell, many of them are still in the very midst of the battle. But they are still just moms and dads and kids who long to connect, both within their own family units and with others who understand. Today was truly a joy-filled gift.
3 brave warriors comparing their stories and their battle scars
Thanks for giving thanks with me.
“He is the one you praise; he is your God, who performed for you those great and awesome wonders you saw with your own eyes.” (Deuteronomy 10:21)
“You, God, are my God, earnestly I seek you; I thirst for you, my whole being longs for you, in a dry and parched land where there is no water. I have seen you in the sanctuary and beheld your power and your glory. Because your love is better than life, my lips will glorify you. I will praise you as long as I live, and in your name I will lift up my hands.” (Psalms 63:1-4)
~ for a special birthday for my favorite 19 year old! How is my little Coopy 19??? So proud of the young man he has become, and excited to see what doors God will open for his future. We celebrated with his tasty menu of choice: an elaborate build-your-own burrito bar and banana pudding.
~ for a Jucy’s hamburger salad piled high with a seasoned patty, chopped bacon, pickles, and zesty jalapeño ranch.
~ for the riotous chorus of clucking/honking/quacking/crowing in the garden. I’m so used to it I don’t always even notice. Until I’m on the phone in the garden and the person on the other end of the line asks me, “Um…are you at the ZOO???”
~ for happy pumpkins erupting everywhere.
~ for mail-order heirloom roses. They don’t look like much today, but I dream of them stretching up on our little pergola, draping their fragrant blooms up and over.
~ for the most generous gift of repurposed flagstone, even with delivery!
~ for another HEAT football victory. Gavin has had such a fun season with his teammates, and the coaches have truly poured into these young men. They are getting so much more than football.
~ for fresh flowers on my table, this time a rustic mix of bright grocery store blooms and cuttings from around the farm in a vintage copper pan.
~ for a fun overnight – this time was Zoe’s turn. The kids always love these one-on-one getaways. Uncle Justin and Aunt Gina (and Grandmommy) make each one feel so very loved and special.
~ for an unexpected afternoon for Samantha. She went into the orthodontist for a consultation…and she came out with braces! Just like that! This is our first rodeo (probably with several more to come) so HERE WE GO!
Isn’t she beautiful?
~ for buttery, tart and sweet, melt-in-your-mouth apple crisp, warm from the oven, topped with vanilla ice cream and hot, decadent salted caramel sauce. Is your mouth watering like mine? No pictures, because who could possibly wait and take a photo???
~ for a treasured evening with our Gold Network families at our quarterly CONNECT support group. These gatherings are my favorite: good food and the best, desperately needed, life-giving connections. Over plates piled high with the best fajitas from Abuelos, we talked about our babies. We listened quietly. And we all came away with at least a little more reassurance that we are not walking this walk alone. BUT GOD.
After a night with these precious, hurting families, and then a Sunday morning sermon about hope amidst suffering, there was nothing like spending the afternoon watching “The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe” with the children. My raw heart lay throbbing on the floor as glorious King Aslan willingly sacrificed his life for Edmund’s treachery.
Thank You Jesus. Thank You for paying the debt You did not owe and that I could never pay. Thank You for the reminder that our suffering always has a purpose, to draw us and others closer to Your Father heart. Thank You for defeating death once and for all, and for the glorious Promise that there is so much LIGHT and LIFE beyond this dark and broken world.
Do you know Jesus? Don’t wait.
Thanks for giving thanks with me.
“He has saved us and called us to a holy life—not because of anything we have done but because of his own purpose and grace. This grace was given us in Christ Jesus before the beginning of time, but it has now been revealed through the appearing of our Savior, Christ Jesus, who has destroyed death and has brought life and immortality to light through the gospel.” (2 Timothy 1:9-10)
“For God, who said, “Let light shine out of darkness,” made his light shine in our hearts to give us the light of the knowledge of God’s glory displayed in the face of Christ. But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us.” (2 Corinthians 4:6-7)
For peace in the garden. Every morning, i slip away. All my people are sleeping the house is quiet.
First, to the goat pen. The boys with their gentle eyes stretch their legs and tumble out of their little barn, nuzzling noses pushing one another aside to compete for the first morning back rub.
Then the birds. The roosters burst from the coop, with the ladies more cautiously following suit. Clarence emerges from the roost he shares with his unlikely roommates, and waddles and whistles his way to the pond, ever teetering on the line between chicken and duck. Then the geese and Leroy, noisy to mask their cowardice, burst from their little house, honking and quacking to one another with every webbed step.
And now I get to sit. I sit and watch the animals. I sit and observe the trio of hummingbirds that flit about the feeder. I sit and look at the pumpkin vines that daily erupt further out of their beds, trailing out into the garden paths. I sit and enjoy the happy little flowers peeking from their pots and beds.
It isn’t quiet. It’s a chorus of clucking and honking and bleeting and chirping and quacking.
It isn’t quiet. But it is.
It’s my favorite spot to start my day, in the simple beauty of all that God has created, to spend time with Him, in His Word and in His Presence. The world is waiting for me, to pounce on me with worry and busy-ness and 116,426 to-do lists competing for check offs. But in the garden, my hurried heart is still before Him.
And He always meets me there.
Thanks for giving thanks with me.
“In the morning, Lord, you hear my voice; in the morning I lay my requests before you and wait expectantly.” (Psalms 5:3)
“Satisfy us in the morning with your unfailing love, that we may sing for joy and be glad all our days.” (Psalms 90:14)
“I come to the garden alone, While the dew is still on the roses; And the voice I hear, falling on my ear, The Son of God discloses. And He walks with me, and He talks with me, And He tells me I am His own, And the joy we share as we tarry there, None other has ever known.” (In the Garden, C. Austin Miles)
There’s nothing like Gold Run week. It’s emails and errands, yard signs and donation pickups, tv interviews and newspaper interviews and over-the-phone interviews. It’s checklists and double-checking lists and oh-my-goodness-I-nearly-forgot.
Like my new ride????🎗️
And life is also relentlessly happening. School and cross country and football, goats and chickens and too many puppies, laundry and dishes and lots of cereal and frozen pizzas for dinner.
And then it’s here.
Gold Run day was glorious. The weather was perfection. We had a bounty of volunteers. The park filled with HEROES and their Tribes of supporters, runners and walkers and watchers.
It means the world to these families (myself included) to experience the love and encouragement of people who show up to stand beside them and publicly support. One HERO mama said it best, “It was fun and I was so proud of my bunch. A 5K seems like such a small thing but it was a ‘suck it, cancer!’ event for us.”
Watching HEROES cross the finish line. Watching triumphant families celebrating the lives of their child. Watching weary, battle-scarred moms and dads and grandparents push through the fog to prove that their child’s battle means something. Watching tearful parents walking to honor the memory of the child whose only physical presence there was on our Wall and in their hearts. ETX Gold Run is so special. My heart is full.
And just like that, it’s done.
September is almost over. Pumpkin Spice is back, temps are dropping (outside of Texas anyway), and everyone is ready for fall.
Please don’t let all the GOLD fade away for a whole year. Keep having conversations. Donate. Reach out to a family. Volunteer. These kids deserve a voice and a chance at a normal life. It really does matter.
BUT IT ALL MATTERS.
Whatever is your personal passion. Or the real life, everyday work/school/kids/dishes/carpool that doesn’t feel like passion at all.
Run your race.
“And whatever you do, do it heartily, as to the Lord and not to men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the reward of the inheritance; for you serve the Lord Christ.” (Colossians 3:23-24)
The Lord gently (sometimes abruptly) reminds me that I must both give thanks for and always be in prayer over all of it. ALL of it. My marriage, my kids, my responsibilities, and all that Gold Network is.
It’s all His.
Lord, it’s all Yours. Your ministry. Let me seek You everywhere and find You there. Let me honor You and reflect You in whatever it is I’m doing.
Thanks for giving thanks with me.
“Let them give thanks to the Lord for his unfailing love and his wonderful deeds for mankind. Let them sacrifice thank offerings and tell of his works with songs of joy.” (Psalms 107:21-22)
~ for more and more gold! Individuals, local businesses, schools, and across the nation, CHILDHOOD CANCER AWARENESS IS SPREADING! This truly means the world to kids and their families, to see that their fight MATTERS.
~ for several sweet pups finding their families. Even though it’s always bittersweet to say goodbye, we are so excited to see the joy these babies bring to their new owners. And this time, a puppy went home to one of our own! So I will get to see my GrandPuppy! Pups still available – please share!
This sweet couple loved the first puppy they got from us so much, they got ANOTHER ONE!!!
~ for another great week of football and cross country for Gavin and Kora.
~ for a priceless new #gogold bracelet, a gift from a HERO friend.
~ for the quiet moments I steal in the garden each morning, before all my people wake up for the day. The dew is heavy on the grass, and the air is crisp and still. It’s just me and my coffee with the pumpkins and hummingbirds and goats.
It’s Gold Run week, and that means CRUNCH TIME. This week will be checklists and news interviews, speaking engagements and walkthroughs. We hit a major milestone for FULL TIME CHILDHOOD CANCER AWARENESS: a full wrap on the family van! The “bus” (as we lovingly call her) has always gotten a lot of attention because of her size, so I figured it just made sense to capitalize on that attention for a purpose! I am THRILLED with the final product, and can’t wait to drive her around!
Every day I find myself freshly amazed at all that God has done, and give Him ALL THE GLORY for the ministry of Gold Network of East Texas.
Not too late to register for East Texas Gold Run! Join us Saturday for free family fun on the beautiful brick streets of Tyler, ice cold lemonade, and a front row seat to see some amazing HERO kids and their families.
Whether you run, walk, stroll, or crawl; or whether you just show up and GIVE, you truly make a difference.
Grateful for your prayers this week! For me personally, and for all our Gold Network HERO families. There will be many of their happy faces enjoying the festivities on Saturday. But we also have several grieving families who are desperately hurting, and a number of kids who are in the hospital right now. It’s not all gold beads and ribbons. There’s a very real battle going on.
But God.
Thanks for giving thanks with me.
“Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.” (Galatians 6:2)
“Then you will call, and the Lord will answer; you will cry for help, and he will say: Here am I.” (Isaiah 58:9a)
He always does, but like I talked about last week, sometimes we forget. But God.
He is always right on time.
It’s been weeks and weeks and weeks of drought and oppressive, blistering temperatures across Texas. The ground is cracked, aching for moisture. Once green grass is now crispy, scorched.
Isn’t it interesting how we sometimes begin to look like our environment.
I have felt lost, dry, thirsty.
Searching for answers, searching for peace. Desperately searching.
I only need to be desperate for HIM.
In Him are all the answers. In Him is my rest. In Him is the peace I thirst for.
He is always right on time.
This afternoon the sky began to darken. A while later, a low murmur of thunder echoed from afar. I was working in the barn, kids playing in the background. We all began to pray and ask Jesus to bring the rain. I began to sing and a couple of them chimed in, “Let it rain, let it pour from heaven. Let it rain, to revive my soul…”
Nothing.
The temperature dropped slightly a couple hours later, and the wind began to pick up.
Finally…I could hear drops, one at a time, begin to scatter loudly on the metal barn roof. One ran out from the casita screaming, “IT’S RAINING!!!!!” In an instant, it was a full on rainstorm, pouring, thundering, becoming deafening on our metal roof. Soon we were all outside. We, like undoubtably countless others across East Texas, couldn’t stop ourselves from getting IN IT. Soaking up the goodness of God and praising Him.
He’s always right on time.
Josh had chores to do, animals to put up for the night. “Let me find you an umbrella,” I called out. “I don’t need one,” he said with a smile in his eyes, “I want to enjoy it.”
Once chores were done, kids dried off and settled, he and I stepped outside to literally soak up the last moments of the waning shower. It was glorious. The air smelled clean, the rain was cold. We stood there, letting ourselves be washed. Thankful.
We both knew it was more than the weather we were experiencing.
He is always right on time.
Thanks for giving thanks with me.
“He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end.” (Ecclesiastes 3:11)
“Ask the Lord for rain in the springtime; it is the Lord who sends the thunderstorms. He gives showers of rain to all people, and plants off the field to everyone.” (Zechariah 10:1)
“Let us acknowledge the Lord; let us press on to acknowledge him. As surely as the sun rises, he will appear; he will come to us like the winter rains, like the spring rains that water the earth.”” (Hosea 6:3)
Just being honest. And I bet you’ve all been there.
This week has been hard. We are going through a hard season. Not “my-baby-has-cancer” hard, but still hard. And sometimes when you’ve been through an unfathomably hard season like that, you struggle with guilt in the “regular-sized” hard seasons. Like somehow surviving a truly devastating trial should have made you immune to struggle for the rest of your life.
I should have rock solid faith.
I should be unshakeable.
I write about gratitude every single week. It should come naturally.
All those things may well be true. But life happens. Strength wanes. Perspective skews. Like the constant pounding of waves against a shoreline, bravery gets eroded little by little by the relentless pounding of the daily grind.
The Texas heat this summer is oppressive. The earth is scorched and panting for rain. Doesn’t it feel like it will be like this forever? Don’t you sometimes wonder if it will ever rain again? Sometimes our hearts can feel like that dry, parched desert. It’s so easy to forget the well-watered seasons of plenty. And you best believe the day will come when we will once again find ourselves complaining of the cold, or how inconvenient the rain can be.
So anyway, recent circumstances left me feeling dried up, weary, and defeated. And this morning, staying in bed with the covers over my head sounded a lot more appealing than pulling myself together and putting on a forced brave face at church.
But God.
My perfect Father, as any good dad would, reminded me that hiding was not the answer, that fellowship in His House with His people was exactly what I needed.
And wouldn’t you know it? Why was I surprised that the sermon met me right where I was? The story of Peter, who had walked in person side by side with Jesus. Who had heard the Words of Life spoken directly from the lips of the Savior, and who experienced miracle after miracle from the One he called Friend. This man had every reason to ALWAYS be FULL OF FAITH. He KNEW Jesus.
He’d fed the 5000 with Jesus. He’d seen the dead raised and the sea stilled. And now he was walking upon the water, toward Jesus, looking straight into His eyes!
Yet he doubted.
He got scared.
For a moment, he forgot all he had seen, all he had learned. He started focusing on what he (Peter) could do instead of what Jesus could do.
Isn’t that where we go wrong?
He is able. He is faithful. He is good. He is WORKING. He is reaching for you.
Wherever you find yourself today, in a season of rest, of joy, of peace, or one of deep darkness, grief, and loneliness. A season of frustration with minor inconveniences or one of truly life altering catastrophe. It’s ok to feel. It’s ok to struggle. It’s ok to not be brave sometimes.
Just don’t quit.
God often does His best work in the dark. He is drawing something out of you, building something into you, something for your good and for His glory. Refreshing is coming.
My circumstances haven’t changed. But at least my eyes are back where they’re supposed to be.
On Him.
Thanks for giving thanks with me.
“When I said, “My foot is slipping,” your unfailing love, Lord, supported me. When anxiety was great within me, your consolation brought me joy.” (Psalms 94:18-19)
““Come,” he said. Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus. But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, “Lord, save me!” Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. “You of little faith,” he said, “why did you doubt?”” (Matthew 14:29-31)
“O God, You are my God; I shall seek You earnestly; My soul thirsts for You, my flesh yearns for You, In a dry and weary land where there is no water.” (Psalms 63:1)
~ for another sweet Birthday Girl! Our Brown-Eyed-Girl, Zoe, had a great day. Zoe is our quiet one, easily letting herself slip into the background. But she loves that on her birthday, she is the star! And we all enjoyed her menu of choice – dad’s grilled hamburgers and salad, followed by rich chocolate layer cake. Excited to see what God has in store for our girl.
~ for precious puppies. Birdie is such a good mama. And thankful for a comfy spot for me to nest with them for the next few weeks.
~ for lots and lots of projects. There is never a lack of things to work on here on the farm. Last summer was spent building the barn, and this year we still have plenty to do to make this place our little haven. I love that the kids can jump right in. They are learning so much, far beyond the useful and practical skills they THINK they’re learning.
~ for our latest additions to the barnyard and companions for Clarence: our geese, Jack and Diane, and new duck, Leroy.
~ for some divine dining with my love.
~ for the opportunity to be a part of a special wedding of some dear friends. I’m no florist, but I jumped into that role in a leap of faith, and had the most wonderful time. It was a lovely wedding, beautifully put together but not overdone. No pomp. No ego-maniacal bridezilla desperate for the spotlight. Just a delightful couple in love with Jesus and each other, with a fiercely supportive close-knit family supporting them. The simple elegance of this family and the blissfully old-fashioned sentiment of the day will linger with me long after the fragrance of the peonies and eucalyptus have faded. (But what a lovely scent indeed!)
~ thankful to celebrate my retirement from the wedding business.
~ for lingering beauty and crops hanging on despite the drought. Almost everything is desperately fading and crispy, but our little sweet corn harvest is getting close, and one stunning cosmos continues to show off. I love this bright spot in the garden.
Summer is quickly fading away. I don’t ever remember a busier summer. Ever. It makes me crave simplicity. A slower pace. I don’t know if that’s something I’ll ever achieve with our supersized Tribe and supersized schedule, but I know that simplifying is more of a heart condition than anything else. Shaking off the extras and holding fast to what really matters. And married to MY HUSBAND, a “slower pace” isn’t going to mean sitting in my rocking chair. It will be more like sitting beside him on the scaffolding hanging soffit. And coffee. Always coffee.
But there’s no place I’d rather be.
Whatever season you find yourself: glorious mountaintop or lonely valley, busier than busy or quieter than quiet, there is always, always, ALWAYS something to be thankful for.
Thanks for giving thanks with me.
“Truly my soul finds rest in God; my salvation comes from him. Truly he is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, I will never be shaken.” (Psalms 62:1-2)
“Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth!” (Psalms 46:10)
Sundaygratitude 