It is Good to Give Thanks

I am thankful:

~ for the spicy sweet smell of cinnamon spice waffles.

~ for our sweet Sprinkles who surprised us with 7 darling bantam chicks. She’s such a good little mama. And Tatum K is the proudest Grandma.

~ for growth emerging on my baby rose bushes. Looking pretty good for Day 19.

~ for hot, buttery homemade JoJo’s Biscuits to go with our tasty farm fresh eggs.

~ for the beauty of the the intricate lacework of frost glittering on a cold autumn morning.

~ for the tedious task of carefully covering all our garden plants to protect from said frost. We’ve never done this before (really, we’ve never done ANY of this stuff before) so (as per the usual) we weren’t sure what we were doing. Thankfully we got MOST of it covered, and MOST of our plants were salvaged. Definitely a big learning curve, but it was a start. We’ll be better prepared next time!

~ for the meaningful tradition of our Family Thankful Game. Initiated and maintained by Grandmommy, it’s a beautiful way for our family to share our hearts daily as we give thanks for the big and the small things around us. “Dear LORD, we DO have so much to be thankful for.”

~ for a GLORIOUS VICTORY as our Texas Rangers CAME AND TOOK the World Series!!! We watched every game, and I bit off every nail, and we are sure the screams in our barn echoed from Arlington to Arizona. Although we were never quite all together in the same place to watch the games, we were all watching as “together” as possible. And the long-awaited win was an emotional one. Baseball, specifically Texas Rangers baseball, means a lot to our family, and it just felt really special to feel like we got to be a part of history. I know our kids will always remember it.

~ for a lovely evening of worship with our church ladies here at the farm. We feasted on hot soup and fellowship around a blazing campfire. It was a perfect evening.

~ for the next step of progress on finishing the barn. “How can there still be more to do?” you ask. We are learning that there will always be more to do. This week’s project involved, installing custom metalwork on the facia directly below the roofline. It was one of those steps I didn’t really understand…it didn’t seem important. I was absolutely amazed at the difference it made, and so thankful to have that area of the barn protected from the weather. And so very thankful that Cooper was willing to interrupt his plans and come help.

~ for one of our favorite days of the year: the annual trip to Yesterland Farm with our Gold Network of East Texas HERO families. The fall weather was glorious, the staff was welcoming as always, and the air was full of laughter. What a gift to serve such an incredible group of people. They’ve walked through hell, many of them are still in the very midst of the battle. But they are still just moms and dads and kids who long to connect, both within their own family units and with others who understand. Today was truly a joy-filled gift.

3 brave warriors comparing their stories and their battle scars

Thanks for giving thanks with me.

“He is the one you praise; he is your God, who performed for you those great and awesome wonders you saw with your own eyes.” (Deuteronomy 10:21)

“You, God, are my God, earnestly I seek you; I thirst for you, my whole being longs for you, in a dry and parched land where there is no water. I have seen you in the sanctuary and beheld your power and your glory. Because your love is better than life, my lips will glorify you. I will praise you as long as I live, and in your name I will lift up my hands.” (Psalms 63:1-4)

It All Matters

I am thankful.

For a beautifully exhausting week.

There’s nothing like Gold Run week. It’s emails and errands, yard signs and donation pickups, tv interviews and newspaper interviews and over-the-phone interviews. It’s checklists and double-checking lists and oh-my-goodness-I-nearly-forgot.

And life is also relentlessly happening. School and cross country and football, goats and chickens and too many puppies, laundry and dishes and lots of cereal and frozen pizzas for dinner.

And then it’s here.

Gold Run day was glorious. The weather was perfection. We had a bounty of volunteers. The park filled with HEROES and their Tribes of supporters, runners and walkers and watchers.

It means the world to these families (myself included) to experience the love and encouragement of people who show up to stand beside them and publicly support. One HERO mama said it best, “It was fun and I was so proud of my bunch. A 5K seems like such a small thing but it was a ‘suck it, cancer!’ event for us.”

Watching HEROES cross the finish line. Watching triumphant families celebrating the lives of their child. Watching weary, battle-scarred moms and dads and grandparents push through the fog to prove that their child’s battle means something. Watching tearful parents walking to honor the memory of the child whose only physical presence there was on our Wall and in their hearts. ETX Gold Run is so special. My heart is full.

And just like that, it’s done.

September is almost over. Pumpkin Spice is back, temps are dropping (outside of Texas anyway), and everyone is ready for fall.

Please don’t let all the GOLD fade away for a whole year. Keep having conversations. Donate. Reach out to a family. Volunteer. These kids deserve a voice and a chance at a normal life. It really does matter.

BUT IT ALL MATTERS.

Whatever is your personal passion. Or the real life, everyday work/school/kids/dishes/carpool that doesn’t feel like passion at all.

Run your race.

“And whatever you do, do it heartily, as to the Lord and not to men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the reward of the inheritance; for you serve the Lord Christ.” (Colossians 3:23-24)

The Lord gently (sometimes abruptly) reminds me that I must both give thanks for and always be in prayer over all of it. ALL of it. My marriage, my kids, my responsibilities, and all that Gold Network is.

It’s all His.

Lord, it’s all Yours. Your ministry. Let me seek You everywhere and find You there. Let me honor You and reflect You in whatever it is I’m doing.

Thanks for giving thanks with me.

“Let them give thanks to the Lord for his unfailing love and his wonderful deeds for mankind. Let them sacrifice thank offerings and tell of his works with songs of joy.” (Psalms 107:21-22)

Right on Time

I am thankful.

All I can say is that God showed up.

He always does, but like I talked about last week, sometimes we forget. But God.

He is always right on time.

It’s been weeks and weeks and weeks of drought and oppressive, blistering temperatures across Texas. The ground is cracked, aching for moisture. Once green grass is now crispy, scorched.

Isn’t it interesting how we sometimes begin to look like our environment.

I have felt lost, dry, thirsty.

Searching for answers, searching for peace. Desperately searching.

I only need to be desperate for HIM.

In Him are all the answers. In Him is my rest. In Him is the peace I thirst for.

He is always right on time.

This afternoon the sky began to darken. A while later, a low murmur of thunder echoed from afar. I was working in the barn, kids playing in the background. We all began to pray and ask Jesus to bring the rain. I began to sing and a couple of them chimed in, “Let it rain, let it pour from heaven. Let it rain, to revive my soul…”

Nothing.

The temperature dropped slightly a couple hours later, and the wind began to pick up.

Finally…I could hear drops, one at a time, begin to scatter loudly on the metal barn roof. One ran out from the casita screaming, “IT’S RAINING!!!!!” In an instant, it was a full on rainstorm, pouring, thundering, becoming deafening on our metal roof. Soon we were all outside. We, like undoubtably countless others across East Texas, couldn’t stop ourselves from getting IN IT. Soaking up the goodness of God and praising Him.

He’s always right on time.

Josh had chores to do, animals to put up for the night. “Let me find you an umbrella,” I called out. “I don’t need one,” he said with a smile in his eyes, “I want to enjoy it.”

Once chores were done, kids dried off and settled, he and I stepped outside to literally soak up the last moments of the waning shower. It was glorious. The air smelled clean, the rain was cold. We stood there, letting ourselves be washed. Thankful.

We both knew it was more than the weather we were experiencing.

He is always right on time.

Thanks for giving thanks with me.

“He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end.” (Ecclesiastes 3:11)

“Ask the Lord for rain in the springtime; it is the Lord who sends the thunderstorms. He gives showers of rain to all people, and plants off the field to everyone.” (Zechariah 10:1)

“Let us acknowledge the Lord; let us press on to acknowledge him. As surely as the sun rises, he will appear; he will come to us like the winter rains, like the spring rains that water the earth.”” (Hosea 6:3)

9 Years of Gratitude

(**Full disclosure, the whole time I was writing this, I was thinking it had been 10 years. Which obviously feels like a big milestone. Bigger than 9. But this is how I was feeling, so here goes…probably just recycle this post next year when it’s actually been 10.)

9 years.

August 10, 2014 was the day I heard the Lord tell me I needed to start thanking Him.

In the midst of the darkest season of our lives, just weeks into our 8 month old baby’s cancer treatment, He told me to thank Him. I was living in the hospital 2 hours away from my husband and my family. Sawyer was receiving round the clock chemotherapy treatment for a cancer he had a slim chance of surviving. Our comfortable, predictable life as we knew it was over, replaced with a life of hospitals, doctors, nurses, and scary words like spinal tap, bone marrow, and blood transfusion.

I could feel myself sinking.

Sinking into despair.

Sinking into self pity.

Sinking into a dark hole of fear and loneliness.

But my loving Father loved me too much to let me slip away.

As I lay on the clammy blue vinyl cot beside Sawyer’s hospital crib, in the middle of another sleepless night spent watching the clock and the IV pump managing the toxic drugs that were simultaneously saving and attacking my baby’s frail body, I heard God tell me to thank Him for this trial.

Pictures from home hung on Sawyer’s hospital wall

And that’s how Sunday Gratitude was born.

Some weeks giving thanks is as easy as breathing. The colors of the sunset were vibrantly on fire. The most delicious meal looked just as beautiful as it tasted. The project went well, the kids were sweet, and the Lord spoke so clearly I couldn’t miss Him.

But this is real life.

Sometimes it goes sideways.

Sometimes circumstances are hard and dark and ugly.

Sometimes circumstances are fine, but it’s my own heart that’s hard and dark and ugly.

Like every family, we have ups and downs, successes and failures, highlights and bloopers. We have good weeks, and some really bad ones.

I can’t tell you how many Sunday nights I have spent staring at a blank screen, wondering how I was going to find something positive to say.

But God.

He’s just so good, y’all. Because He’s always there. Even if all I can thank Him for is my cup of coffee and the color of the sky, He gives me the ability to do that.

Because no matter what it all looks like, no matter what storms come, no matter how bleak (or how WONDERFUL) life is at any given moment…

HE IS WORTHY.

It doesn’t matter how thankful I feel.

HE IS GOOD.

Cultivating a heart of gratitude is a lifelong process. Even though I’ve had this blog and an audience for accountability for almost a decade, it still doesn’t always come easily. Fiery darts in the form of crippling anxiety and chronic PTSD, along with the relentless cares of this world are ever seeking to rob my joy and squelch my testimony.

But God.

I won’t do it perfectly. But I will praise Him. I will fall, but I will praise Him in the dirt. I will freak out and forget everything I have learned, but He will remind me and I will repent and praise Him again. I will get prideful and start acting like I’ve got it all together, and once I’m done looking and sounding like a fool, I will praise the One who deserves it.

Thank You Jesus, for Who You Are and all You have done. I don’t deserve Your grace, but I’m so so thankful for it.

Thank You for 9 years with Sawyer, 9 years with our family, 9 years of growth, 9 years with all of you.

Thanks for giving thanks with me.

“Lord, you are my God; I will exalt you and praise your name, for in perfect faithfulness you have done wonderful things, things planned long ago.” (Isaiah 25:1)

“Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18)

“I will praise you, Lord my God, with all my heart; I will glorify your name forever.” (Psalms 86:12)

July 23

It’s not a day we celebrate.

But it’s a day we never ever forget.

Cancerversary.

How can this day still knock me out year after year? I cannot express how much I hate that I am still FLATTENED every July 23. There is such a huge part of me that sneers, “Get over it! He’s here! He’s fine! It’s in the past! Thank God for his healing and move on!”

We have SO MUCH that we praise God for! They said he wouldn’t survive the day. BUT GOD! We have our beautiful boy, and 9 years later he is still here living his best life!

But on July 23, I just stay stuck. Stuck reliving every shell-shocked moment of that day. It’s like re-watching a movie when the worst part is about to happen. I want to shout at the unsuspecting characters what I know is coming, “Watch out! You’re about to be hit by a train!”

That is always what I go back to. We never saw it coming. We had no idea that life as we knew it was about to end and would never ever be the same. July 23, 2014 BC. Before Cancer. The steel toe kick to the stomach and the concrete truck sitting on my chest.

The emotions of cancerversary remind me to give thanks and to love big because you never what what’s around the corner.

They remind me that I’m not who I was 9 years ago, and I never will be. Cancer changed my DNA and that’s ok.

They remind me that even though I will never ever understand why this happened to my baby, God is big enough for my questions, my hurt, my anger, and even my unbelief.

They remind me that out of the worst and darkest season of our life were birthed some of the deepest, most genuine and priceless relationships we could never have expected and that would never have developed any other way. And that Sawyer and his story have touched more hearts and opened more doors for the Gospel to go forth than we will ever know.

I didn’t remind Sawyer the significance of this date today. As he has gotten a little older, his emotions have gotten bigger, and I can tell he’s starting to wrestle through some feelings he can’t fully understand. He asks more questions about cancer. About death. I don’t want to stir anything up unnecessarily. He didn’t even notice that I stared at him a little more today, hugged him a little tighter and a little longer, or that I left my sunglasses on even when it wasn’t bright.

I am thankful and I am broken. I am strong. And I am so, so tired of being strong.

Today at church, I wrapped my arms around Sawyer (probably a little too tight) as he stood in front of me during worship. I could feel his little chest rise and fall, and the vibration of each word as he sang from a pure and innocent heart, “I love You Lord for Your mercy never fails me. All my days, I’ve been held in Your hands. From the moment that I wake up, until I lay my head, I will sing of the goodness of God.”

And I know he really means it. And so do I. God really is good, all the time. Even when we don’t understand.

I pray I will one day be free of all fear and dread. That one day I will stop holding my breath. That I will allow myself to imagine Sawyer growing up to be a man. And I pray that I will not transfer any of my burdens onto my beautiful son; that my hangups will never hold him back from all the Lord has for his life.

I look forward to the day when Jesus will wipe away every tear, and no child will ever again be diagnosed with or lost to cancer.

Thanks for giving thanks with me.

“Immediately the father of the child cried out and said with tears, “Lord, I believe; help my unbelief!”” (Mark 9:24)

“I will remember the deeds of the Lord; yes, I will remember your miracles of long ago. I will consider all your works and meditate on all your mighty deeds.”” (Psalms 77:11-12)

“I prayed for this child, and the Lord has granted me what I asked of him. So now I give him to the Lord. For his whole life he will be given over to the Lord.” And he worshiped the Lord there.” (1 Samuel 1:27-28)

Unlikely

Y’all, do you know one of the things that is just so awesome about God? With him, nothing is impossible. He loves to flip the script and shake up all our paradigms and small in-the-box expectations. His specialty is the unlikely.

That is such a picture of my life. (and of course I know it’s a picture of many others…most others in fact… But of course my own life is just my personal frame of reference.)

We see

He saw

We see

He saw

We see

He saw

I know who I was. I know where I came from. I know what I’ve done. LEAST LIKELY TO SUCCEED in every area.

BUT GOD.

He still sees me as His precious child, made in His image to praise Him and bring Him glory.

I know what I can do… and it’s not much to speak of. I know what I can’t do, and the list is a mile long.

BUT GOD.

He sees Jesus, what Jesus can do, and what Jesus CAN’T do (NOTHING!)

God specializes in hand-picking the most unlikely, the most shocking, the most broken individuals.

Moses, the murderous hothead

Rahab, the prostitute

Sarah, the barren doubter

David, the murderer, adulterer

Paul, persecutor of the Church

Do you see yourself in that category? Do you think you are beyond reach? Unlovable? Unsalvageable? Too hard, too lost, too far gone? Perfect. You are right where He wants you. (and if you don’t identify with that category, you might want to look a little closer)

Humbly thankful for a God who never gives up and for a Savior who gave all.

Thank You Lord, for inviting us to a place at Your table.

Thanks for giving thanks with me.

“When the teachers of the law who were Pharisees saw him eating with the sinners and tax collectors, they asked his disciples: “Why does he eat with tax collectors and sinners?” On hearing this, Jesus said to them, “It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick. I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners.”” (Mark 2:16-17)

“But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.” (2 Corinthians 12:9-10)

“being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 1:6)

“Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.”” (Matthew 19:26)

Peace

I am thankful:

~ for so many kind words, messages, and prayers after last week’s blog post. I know I’m not alone in dealing with anxiety, especially during the holidays. The range of emotions and the breakneck pace are a volatile combination. But God is so good.

~ for grace during the Christmas CRUNCH! Last minute shopping, searching frantically for the gifts I KNOW I BOUGHT but somehow can’t find (because I tucked them somewhere SO SAFE), the returns of the duplicates I bought to replace the gifts I couldn’t find (but then found🤪)…traffic that makes me need extra Jesus, and 10,364,292 Christmas activities/events/parties that are all scheduled back to back to back.

AWESOME Annual Christmas with Strangers Concert

~ for a fun road trip to celebrate Grandmommy’s birthday! Which also is the annual kickoff day for a favorite tradition: the 12 Days of Christmas! Grandmommy is so thoughtful and creative to come up with 12 gifts for our family, and we all have a blast singing the song each night and opening a new surprise! So grateful for such a special tradition.

Loved receiving this special window cling nativity, as it brought back a memory of years ago…

It had also been given as a 12 Days gift when Sawyer spent his first Christmas in the hospital during his cancer treatment

~ for the incredible opportunity to make a special trip to Dallas representing Gold Network of East Texas for a long-awaited, IN PERSON check presentation. Each year we donate toward ongoing pediatric cancer research projects at Children’s Health/UTSouthwestern. The past two years we have helped fund research being conducted by one of Sawyer’s most beloved oncologists, Dr. Sam John, but hospital pandemic precaution protocols prevented us from donating in person. A virtual check presentation just isn’t the same. So it was priceless to actually make the trip to Dallas and reunite Sawyer the Warrior with Dr. John, look him in the eyes, and thank him for the important work he is doing.

And we always love the Hero’s Welcome Sawyer receives when he walks his old halls. These doctors and nurses are so very dear to us.

~ for a great trip for Josh and Cooper to watch the Carthage Bulldogs claim their 9th State Football Championship. The kids and I watched and cheered from home. Way to go, Bulldogs!

~ for lots of good progress and backbreaking hard work going on in and around the casita. Septic went in this week! Looking forward to a REAL POTTY soon!

~ for beautiful encouragement from our Father. It’s so easy to let “the season” sweep us away from the Truth. To get off track, lose heart, lose faith in people (and yourself), and see the ever-darkening darkness creeping in around us.

BUT GOD.

He was and is and always will be the Light of the World. He’s STILL HERE. There’s always HOPE. We will always have questions, but HE IS THE ANSWER. And not just in heaven, when this broken world has been made new. He is the answer RIGHT NOW. As long as we are breathing, we have work to do here: repentance to own, people to encourage, the gospel to share. He has peace and FULLNESS OF JOY for us on this earth, when we take His Hand and offer Him His rightful, Righteous place. Emmanuel, God with us.

May we seek Him.

May we find Him.

May we share Him.

I’m so grateful for you, friends.

Thanks for giving thanks with me.

“She will give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus, because he will save his people from their sins.” All this took place to fulfill what the Lord had said through the prophet: “The virgin will conceive and give birth to a son, and they will call him Immanuel” (which means “God with us”).” (Matthew 1:21-23)

“For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders. And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.” (Isaiah 9:6)

And in despair I bowed my head; “There is no peace on earth,” I said; “For hate is strong, And mocks the song Of peace on earth, good-will to men!” Then pealed the bells more loud and deep: “God is not dead, nor doth He sleep; The Wrong shall fail, The Right prevail, With peace on earth, good-will to men.” (Christmas Bells, Henry Wadsworth Longfellow)

It Doesn’t Have to be Perfect…

I am thankful:

~ for a glorious week of lazy mornings, endless cups of coffee, stirring and mixing and baking. We even enjoyed an outdoor movie night with friends complete with campfire and hot cocoa!

But ok, let’s be real – it wasn’t all glorious. Teenagers were teenagers, kids got on each other’s nerves, on my nerves, and the kitchen looked like a war zone. But it doesn’t have to be perfect to be beautiful.

~ for a wonderful, memorable Thanksgiving. The food was delicious and plentiful, and the company was rowdy and loud and jolly. We paused to reflect on Thanksgivings past, and shared hilarious and heartfelt stories from years gone by. We chicken danced in our chicken hats. It wasn’t all refined and Norman Rockwell-esque. It rained all day, we had to drastically modify Pumpkin Olympics, some folks were late, and some couldn’t come at all. Someone locked the kids out of the playhouse, and there were no sweet potatoes. But it doesn’t have to be perfect to be beautiful.

~ for an awesome post-Thanksgiving huddle at our house to stuff our faces a second time with leftovers while cheering on the Carthage Bulldogs to a playoff victory. We ate and munched on delicious fried turkey and succulent glazed ham, and even sweet potatoes made it to the party. Family and old and new friends filled our little home, and we all had a ball. Not quite everyone was able to make it, but it doesn’t have to be perfect to be beautiful.

We started the swap from fall decor to Christmas today. Everything is different from years’ past, and we are figuring it out as we go along. We don’t have the space we used to have, or the ability to DIY or modify anything. I get kind of grumpy and overwhelmed when faced with the seemingly monumental tasks before me (but remain too much of a control freak to delegate). PTSD and anxiety love to creep in (or clobber) unexpectedly, and rob the joy from the simple pleasures like watching the kids overflow with excitement as familiar decorations emerge from their boxes.

But I’m thankful for the reminder that it doesn’t have to be perfect to be beautiful. We miss our loved ones who are gone while we hold tight the ones who are here another year. We wipe up the spilled cocoa and add a few more marshmallows to the cup. We eat the burned cookies and ignore the clumpy icing. We run endless errands in violent traffic and spend more money than we should even when we promised we’d stick to the budget this year. We’ll get the wrong size sweater or forget to make a vegan side dish for Aunt Fran and forget the White Elephant gift for the party.

But Jesus still came.

He left His perfect home with His perfect Father to come down to this broken world.

He came to a terrified teenager in a filthy barn, to a people who didn’t recognize or appreciate Him.

Yet He came.

He came and He stayed and He taught and He healed and He LOVED.

And then He willingly sacrificed Himself for our sins, the sins of then and the sins of now and all the sins yet to be.

Imperfect life.

Perfectly beautiful Savior.

Lord, give us eyes and hearts to see YOU in the midst of the mayhem we create.

Thanks for giving thanks with me.

“Moreover, when God gives someone wealth and possessions, and the ability to enjoy them, to accept their lot and be happy in their toil—this is a gift of God. They seldom reflect on the days of their life, because God keeps them occupied with gladness of heart.” (Ecclesiastes 5:19-20)

“Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me. Cast me not away from your presence, and take not your Holy Spirit from me. Restore to me the joy of your salvation, and uphold me with a willing spirit.” (Psalm 51:10-12)

Small

I am thankful:

~ for a much needed lunch with a friend. It may not have gone exactly (or ANYTHING for that matter) like we had planned, but we knew it was exactly what the Lord had for us that day. And my avocado BLT was DELICIOUS.

~ for Tatum K’s very first Character Quality Award at school. She received a certificate for demonstrating the quality of “Orderliness.” I must admit that this particular award came as rather a mystery to those of us who share a home with Tatum… she’s quite distinctly known for being a tornado, and leaves a wake of princess dresses, miniature doll limbs, and mismatched shoes in her wake. But since receiving her award, she has clearly been inspired to rise to the expectation. She has been picking up after herself, announcing, “Mama, I’m being ‘orderliness.’” Love that sweet girl.

~ for an awesome night of great food, fellowship, and testimonies at church. And thanks so much Miss Ruth, for sending me home with the tastiest pasta salad EVER!

~ for a perfect evening out at our friends’ farm. What a joy to share a meal in the fresh air and watch all our kids running and enjoying one another. My loves are chomping at the bit to get their own chickens ASAP!

~ for beautiful moments. That is my favorite part of being out on the farm. It’s just so refreshing to breathe deeply real fresh air and look out at God’s Creation.

To listen. And to feel really small.

There’s something…I don’t know, it’s so hard to describe. But it seems like there’s something…IMPORTANT…to having eyes to see what God alone has made, from the most majestic to the minute.

Sometimes it’s just necessary to realign our perspective. God is God. I am not. I may pray to him dozens of times throughout the day, and talk to Him intimately as a Father and a friend.

But He is the Alpha and the Omega, the Beginning and the End. And He spoke life from nothingness with a WORD.

It’s good that we remember Who we are talking to.

And it’s good to feel small.

Thanks for giving thanks with me.

“Lord, our Lord, how majestic is your name in all the earth! You have set your glory in the heavens. When I consider your heavens, the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars, which you have set in place, what is mankind that you are mindful of them, human beings that you care for them? Lord, our Lord, how majestic is your name in all the earth!” (Psalms 8:1, 3-4, 9)

Where Did it Go?

I am thankful:

~ for a few, very few, lazy days left of summer.

~ for a fresh and yummy mini date with my Love at Salsaritas.

~ for the joy of finding Fur-ever homes for our puppies! Thank you so much to everyone who has shared my posts or spread the word! Only 3 little boys left!

~ for Whataburger malts to celebrate August Tonight, a very special day to remember and honor a very special man.

As for many others, our “summer” will officially come to a close this week as the kids go back to school. The mountains of supplies have been assembled, sorted, and labeled. Shiny new shoes sit waiting in their boxes – HUGE boxes of HUGE SHOES!!! WHO ARE THESE GIANT-FOOTED CREATURES AND WHAT HAVE THEY DONE WITH MY CHILDREN!? Backpacks and lunch boxes are at the ready. I can’t believe we’re here already.

It seems like yesterday that we were packing up the moving trucks.

And telling the kids about our dream of a farm…

Where did it go?

It’s been a very different summer. But in a good way. It’s been a sifting summer, a refining summer. A season of dreaming and reflecting and shifting and regrouping. Some parts I would choose, and some parts make me want to get back in my bed.

As if that was an option.

Time marches on. My babies aren’t babies anymore.

Now this little nugget is finally going off to school. (Pretty much against my will.)

She couldn’t be more excited. She asks me every 20 minutes how many days until school starts. She pats my hand and says, “You’ll be ok, Mama. You have Bear and Birdie.”

I haven’t been alone in 23 years. This year my BABY baby is starting school, and my 3rd oldest baby will graduate from high school.

I am not ok. I have planned my schedule meticulously.

• drop kids off at school

• return home

• cry

• eat donuts in bed

• repeat

It’s fine. I’m fine. Everything is fine.

Thanks for giving thanks with me.

“Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” (1 Thessalonians‬ ‭5:16-18‬)